Crying is for babies

Crying is for babies

A while ago I heard a boy of about five years old shouting at a classmate, who had to cry about something, say: "Do you have to cry now ?! Crying is for babies!" That comment made me think pretty hard. Why is crying for babies? I am such a mother who prefers to let her newborn children cry as little as possible. And why should my five-year-old son not cry if he has fallen ?! In fact, why should I not cry when I am sad or angry ?!

I have regularly heard patients say that it was not appreciated at home when they showed their emotions. They would cry in their room (if at all) and anger should not be voiced (let it eat you up inside). As a baby, on the other hand, they had, of course, had their tear-filled hours. There's something very old-fashioned in letting your baby cry.

A child does not cry for nothing
But as I said, I am such a mother who can not let her baby cry. A child does not cry for nothing: it misses you, has pain, is hungry or whatever. All reasons to give the baby as soon as possible what it needs and voilà: it stops crying! If, on the other hand, my five-year-old son falls, he may well have a proper cry. First crying for a moment and then tell me calmly what happened. The same with anger: if my three-year-old daughter is not allowed to splash the whole bathroom wet, she may get very mad at me. And I explain that I have to clean it all and then have no time to play with her if she out of a bath (or something like this). Only towards adulthood will it be important to express those same emotions a little less directly or to postpone it: if my husband has had a bad day at work, he can grumble, but is it more convenient to do that at a good time?

Crying is also for children and adults
So no, crying is not for babies. They do it regularly, but they do it (usually) with a very good reason that can easily be solved. And yes, crying is best for children and adults! In my opinion, we sometimes do too little. Do you have a good reason for this: then go for a nice meal. In the time of Freud, there was also talk of catharsis: expressing and experiencing emotions with regard to unpleasant or traumatic events would have a cleansing or relieving effect (katharsis is Greek for 'purification' or 'cleansing'). And often that is also the case: having a good time whining with grief or just getting angry when something goes wrong can be a relief. And again: no, that is not (only) for babies!

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  • lorenluke

    The " Babies need to cry to get solid" is an old spouses' story, obliging the totally believable hypothesis that the lungs and the muscles in that should be supersized like each other muscle, a similar way child figures out how to hold his head up, sit up, Instant Assignment Help Online and walk. Along these lines, when a harried youthful mother can't get her kid to quiet down,

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